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NEVER

“NEVER.”

That bitter sentence

sucks

a black hole

swallowing my dreams.

I dangle over the abyss.

“No more,” and

“never again,”

echo,

mocking my wishes,

carving canyons

impossible

to cross.

I expected better

although I don’t know why

I feel cheated,

trapped,

lost.

Am I still myself?

I hate this new

definition.

One without warning.

Involuntary.

Permanent.

How can I

accept

this

never

 

—DarEll S. Hoskisson 1/16

The final punctuation is up to the reader.

Is it:

How can I accept this?

Never!

or

How can I accept this “never?”

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The Enemy

Hurt.

I carry the burning scars

with me.

I face them

in the mirror

every day.

The memory

inflames me

with justifiable

anger.

 

Hurt.

I will never forget

or let you in

no matter how long

you knock.

I can’t listen.

It doesn’t matter.

There is no

excuse.

 

Agony.

The betrayal.

You should have been

my friend!

 

Agony.

You might have been

if only

I had been

yours.

–DarEll S. Hoskisson 1/29/16

**I don’t believe this is always true.  There are truly enemies we need to protect ourselves and our families from, acts of true barbarism that can’t be allowed to be repeated.

But, in general, who the aggressor is in any frictional or one-sided relationship is less clear.

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Friend

Friend

It isn’t that you

can’t hurt me or won’t.

It isn’t that you

can’t leave me or don’t.

The risk is real and

inevitable.

It is that I believe

that we will get through it somehow,

that although pain will come, it will be unintentional, and

that you are worth it.

–DarEll S. Hoskisson

1/28/16

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What trusting is

“Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.”

 George Eliot quotes (English Victorian Novelist. Pseudonym of Mary Ann Evans, 1819–1880)

I have always loved this quote.  But, now that I have studied trust more fully, I see that this is a definition of what trust feels like.  It is an experience of trust.

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The Champion

Hah!

I laugh!

I smile!

I dance in spite of you!

 

You forget,

I’m not alone.

I know that

You can’t win without me.

 

Fear, I spin upon your chest.

Shake and tremble all you will,

I dance still.

 

Jealousy, just give up on me.

I stomp in cheerful unity.

VICTORY!!

 

Pain, I know you have a claim,

But I will hug you ’til you bend my way.

I’m okay.

 

Fatigue, you just don’t get it.

I’m

Still

Moving.

 

Anger, rage if you will.

Hurt, betray, or annoy

I give with joy.

 

You can not make me not love you,

nor take what I freely give.

Life,

You just got the best of me.

DSH

Jan 15, 2008

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Make a Difference Day

This information was taken from our local newspaper.  It is a national, annual thing.  So, if you don’t catch it this year, look for it the next.  I’m sure the prize money is specific to this year.

Start a project. Volunteer. Make a difference.
Join us for Make A Difference Day on Saturday, October 24th when millions across the nation will unite to improve the lives of others.
You can register your project here: makeadifferenceday.com. You’ll have the opportunity to receive 1 of 13 $10,000 donations from Newman’s Own.
In its 24th year, Make A Difference Day is a USA TODAY initiative and is the largest national day of community service. Whether it’s cleaning a local park or working with your town’s animal rescue center, you can serve your local community and make a positive impact on Make A Difference Day.
You can choose to start your own project or work on one that’s already been established – every contribution makes a difference. Many projects also need volunteers to support their efforts. Search on makeadifferenceday.com to find one near you.
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A mother’s must see movie

Mom’s Night Out
is definitely a movie mothers with small children, especially stay at home moms, can relate to. It was so funny I was crying. It is not the kind of movie that interests the children, all but my nine year old left the room. It is also not for people who would be offended by Christian values since it appears to be a Christian film. I super, super loved it. It is a very good reminder of how and why we mothers shouldn’t and can’t lose perspective or our minds. 🙂 It is very encouraging. Happy Mothering! I’d love to buy a copy for all my sisters.